This drives me absolutely nuts.
Gender should not dictate life choices or societal expectations.
The specific point Paul mentioned was that it’s fine, even normal, for a woman to feel that way. But if a man says the same thing…He’s not considered a real man.
A man doesn’t knit or cross-stitch or do any similar crafty stuff. He should be in the garage, tuning his sexy sportscar.
On the other hand, if a woman’s in the garage, tuning her sexy sportscar…People think, “Wow! What an independent woman!” She’s taken a huge step forward for feminism!
Karin brings up a different kind of double standards: Parents treat daughters differently from sons.
What it all boils down to is that I’m an adult with rather less freedom than her younger by three years brother.
Understand, it’s by choice that I don’t date. I’ve 2 brothers and dozens of boy cousins around my age and older. I believe that boys are only good for carrying shopping bags until they reach their early twenties. By nature, I’m not a partier either.
Nor is it that I’m not allowed out the house. I am. My parents just insist on finding out who I’m with, where I’m going and what time I’ll be back before I leave the house. My brother leaves the house, grabs his bike and cycles a couple of kilometers away to his pal’s place and comes home whenever.
They pick me up from school, whereas my brothers, including the youngest who’s 6 years younger than me, return home on their own.
I can live with that, because I know I’m leaving. That is my endgame, and that’s what I’m playing for.
That said, I’m relatively lucky.
I’ve girlfriends whose parents spend tens of thousands of dollars to send them overseas to study.
This girl, we’ll call her R, is super-smart. She regularly tops the maths and physics classes. She wants to become an engineer.
What’s wrong with that? I say nothing. You’d probably say the same thing. In fact, if you don’t, this probably isn’t a blog you want to read.
Her parents say that it’s not a career that suitable for a girl. They want her to become a teacher because it’s ‘suitable for a girl.’
WTF? You are paying soooo much for her study in a good school, and when she wants to become an engineer, you decide that she should be a teacher instead?
This are Asian parents you’re talking about. Money Money Money. Engineers earn more than teachers! And it’s not like she wants to become an artist.
Sometimes people really fuck with my head.